FML Friday

It's that time again, the time to get a good chuckle and maybe make you feel just a little better about our own lives. Copied from one of my fav sites FML: Your everyday life stories, here ya go....


Today, I went for a ride with my son. I noticed he didn't have his seat belt on. To teach him a lesson, I drove very slowly and hit the brakes really hard. The impact was greater than I thought, so my son hit his head against the window and left a huge crack. He just laughed. FML


Today, I was working with the kid I babysit for. We were out and he complained that he was hungry. I spent my very last $2 on chicken nuggets for him and a coffee for myself. Just as I sat down, he knocked over my coffee, spilling it into his chicken nuggets. Then he cried for over an hour. FML


Today, I checked my Facebook notifications to see that someone likes my new single status. My ex. FML


Today, I went to my doctor to get my x-ray results. Turns out, I have a fractured spine and a chip of my spine has moved. Now I'm in a neck brace because my dad didn't think it was serious, and told me to "suck it up princess." FML

Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML


Today, I was dissecting a pig for my anatomy class. The smell of four day-old dead pig caused me to faint. My mom drove me home and warmed me up some left overs for lunch. It was pork chops. FML


Today, while at work at a maternity and baby clothes store, I was supposed to send out an email about our "Beat the Clock" sale. After it was sent to over 500 people, I realized that I'd misspelled the subject line. It read, "Beat the Cock Sale." FML


Today, my four-year-old daughter thought it'd be funny to cut my hair while I was sleeping. FML


Today, my daughter learned that if she rips a toy out of its package in front of a store employee, mommy will be forced to buy it. She now has two new toys today. FML


Today, I realized why my bathroom has been smelling so bad. My 10 year old son has been peeing on the radiator thinking it was fun to watch it steam and sizzle. FML